Adrian Nicole LeBlanc
401 pages
Read in 21 days
It has been a month since my last post. I have read three books since I finished the blog but unfortunately I haven’t had time to update it because December is the busiest month of the year for me at work. Even though I have been travelling a lot, with all the time in the air and down-time in airports, it has been nice to have a book to turn to. I like the escape that a good book can provide and the most recent ones with this project have been just great.Newsweek says that "it took LeBlanc 10 years immersed in the lives of one Bronx family to produce this gripping, cinematic account of urban poverty and its causes. It will take you two days to read it." Newsweek, bite me…two days, my arse. At least say that it is two days where you are not interrupted by kids, work, or life. Two days, sheesh. On your summary of the book, however, I can't agree with you more.
The book follows two women, Jessica and Coco, through all of the highs and lows of their lives. As stated above, LeBlanc became a part of these families for over ten years and the detail reflects this. As a reader, you are there in the moment. You cringe as she describes rodent infested apartments or as abusive threats are hurled. Jessica becomes involved with a dangerous drug dealer named Boy George. Coco is involved with Jessica's younger brother, Cesar. Cesar is more small-time than Boy George but still dangerous.
I can't say that Jessica and Coco don't try. Jessica thought that her way out was by living on the fast lane with Boy George. She did taste the "good-life" with nice cars and clothes, trips on yachts, and fancy dinners. That moment was short-lived as Boy George and Jessica are arrested and sentenced to lengthy prison terms. Jessica is very distant with her children (she has 5 with different fathers). Coco also has 5 children (again, from different fathers), but she seems to always have her heart in the right place but unfortunately constantly makes decisions that are focused on the short-term and are ill-fated. While Jessica is in prison, the story follows Coco as she tries to make a better life but lacks the skills and funds to pick her family out of the grips of poverty. As I mentioned, LeBlanc does a superb job in chronicling what Coco goes through without having to launch on a "what is wrong with this country when any population has to endure this" diatribe. Rather, her style is straight-forward: tell the facts and let the reader decide.
For me, it is the image of the kids living through all of this that stays with me several weeks after finishing the book. As a father, I think (read: hope) most parents go through this: you wonder whether you are doing a good job. And yes, it sounds clichéd to say this, but you wonder if you are a good provider, a role model to your kids. There are the frustrations, your words seem to never sink in or are just ignored. There are other times that you forget they are not adults and will make mistakes over and over again. Most of the time, though, they bring a smile to your face as they do something silly or amaze you as they learn words, the alphabet, and read. Every day, there is something new and every day you are amazed that you created them. I know the characters in Random Family must have had these thoughts at some point. They must have wondered if they were doing a good job also. However, there were times where I wondered what their definition means to them.
Coco's oldest daughter, Mercedes, is seven-years old when LeBlanc writes:
Everything Mercedes did seemed to bother Coco: Coco relied on her as a helpmate and confidante, then yelled at Mercedes for acting grown. She chided Mercedes for forgetting to charge Pearl's (Coco's baby) Pampers or for scolding Nikki (the middle child), but neither was Mercedes free to be a child. When she tried to be affectionate with her mother, even her hugs seemed to weigh to heavily around Coco's neck. "You ain't a baby, Mercedes!" she would threaten.
I can't imagine the weight of the family duties being put on a seven-year-old's shoulders. How difficult it would be to be an adult to endure this, let alone have a child take on the familial duties. The children can't live as children in this environment. Their daily life is bombarded with violence, drugs, and pests (among many other things that most of us take for granted). Sadly, as is illustrated with Jessica's oldest child, Serena, while they think they are better than their parents, they inevitably go down the same path and the cycle continues.
As an outsider, it is easy to read the book and wonder how the characters could make the same mistakes or wonder why they can't find a way to get out of their situation. I had a moment of self-reflection while reading this book. I often wondered what I would do in their shoes. Would I find a way out of that situation? The thing is, there is no way to know how you will handle yourself with the same, limited option available. I am fortunate; I came from a stable family life. I was given all the opportunities for advancement. We had food on the table, a roof over our heads, and a community that was safe. I never came close to the environment that is described in Random Family.
The term learned helplessness seems unfair to label on this random family to explain how they never seem to get out of their situation. The abyss that is poverty is a social problem that pulls the people who are trapped in it down further. They can glimpse the "better life" on the horizon and some have success through pushing themselves to better themselves through education. Sadly, a majority find it through the drug-trade in which incarceration or death are the more likely outcomes to that path. For the rest, the struggles of every day life are taxing and there is no clear path for the way out.
Up next (and I hope to write it up next week) is Botany of Desire by Michael Pollan.
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